The death of someone we love and care for is hard enough under normal circumstances.
Now, until further notice, we cannot gather physically to mark, honour, remember, celebrate, cry and laugh for our family member, friend or colleague.
There has been a recent trend to ‘direct cremations’ and no ceremony. I am not keen on this. Even a simple ceremony acknowledges the death, names it out loud, allows us to recognise that this person is no longer with us in the physical. And begins the separation from that person. It allows us to express our love.
So, what to do? FDANZ, Funeral Directors Association of NZ has published on their website a great four-page range of suggestions developed by Tandem Road and Tricia Hendry. I recommend downloading and reading it.
The ideas are easy to implement, e.g. lighting a candle or making a photo board (this could be done online as a shared activity).
What it doesn’t mention is the role of the independent Celebrant, such as myself. Non-religious but well versed in the nature of funerals, memorials and any ceremony that has meaning for its participants. Someone to use as a soundboard, to help action a ceremony and keep it simple.
Therefore, I am offering a listening ear and conversation to anyone who would like support to:
- Write an interim eulogy, or a personal tribute, etc. while your loved one is fresh in your thinking
- Talk about simple ways at home, with whoever you are in lockdown with, to have a simple marking, and/or set up a special memory place or book etc.
This service is on offer by phone, Skype, Zoom, WhatsApp or email. At this stage I am gifting this service or open to Koha.
09 816 8800, 0274745003
www.kerryannstanton (See some photos and check me out!)
So, stay in your bubble, reach into your self for ideas that work for you, reach out to share this with others and reach out to me or another Celebrant for a supportive conversation.